Facts: Little Red riding Hood is a nice little girl.
Analysis: Right from the start we can tell that this story is about an infant who has been cruelly and meanly mocked with this nickname by the other children. Probably because of a red hat knitted by her mommy, which the little girl wears due to a physical sensitivity to cold in the scalp region.
Thus we’re dealing with a marginalized sickly being discouraged by the cruel society she lives in
Facts: Little red Riding Hood goes on daily walks with a basket of goodies for her grandma who lives in the forest.
Analysis: No normal grandma lives in the fucking woods. The only plausible explanation is that this grandma got a parcel of timbered land following government retrocession. It is well known that peasants will not hesitate to pillage timber especially in the cold season. So this grandma is an old cheap battleaxe who built her house in the woods (probably without proper approval from the forestry byre). The theory according to which grandma is a bitch is verified by the fact that instead of hiring a home delivery service, she forces her granddaughter (a frail and sickly infant) to commute daily from the city into the woods, without giving a rat’s ass about the dangers the poor girl is exposed to.
Facts: Little Red meets the big bad wolf who asks her about her journey through the woods.
Analysis: Already we enter a zone of pure sick fantasy. First of all because Romania doesn’t have that many wolves left, second, they run like hell when they see man, and three, they don’t god damn speak, and even if they did, they’d probably ask for the nearest chewable cadaver or if there were any poachers around. The only reasonable explanation is that Little Red Riding Hood watches too much Animal Planet and therefore is familiar with wildlings behaviors and understands wolf howls.
Facts: The wolf rides ahead of Little Red who stops to pick some flowers, gets to the house, throws his voice and swallows grandma.
Analysis: Passing over the fact that flowers don’t grow in forests, the thing that absolutely must be understood teaching our children that it’s not nice to stop and pick flowers when you have a job to do, especially forest flowers which are rare, protected and possibly endangered.
The wolf on the other hand, seems to be the laughing stock of fairytale creators. If we also read The Three Little Pigs or Boy who Cried Wolf, we may observe a very well defined stereotype. The wolf is and individual driven by this perpetual need to break into people’s houses. He uses all his capabilities, throws his voice, if that doesn’t work, obviously frustrated, he huffs and puffs and blows the house down. Conclusion: The wolf is actually the mailman.
Grandma bites the bait and lets the wolf in. This is grandma’s image: an old senile hag who is unable to differentiate a woodland creature’s howls from the voice of her own frail granddaughter. This is the image our children will bear to the grave.
Facts: The wolf puts on grandma’s clothes, lays in bed where he is found by Little Red Riding Hood. He draws her near him with cunning words and swallows Red as well
Analysis: This crosses every line. The wolf is a transvestite, this is unheard of. What kind of sick mind can feed children such crap? And the dialogue between Red and the wolf is filled with innuendos and sexual allusions: everything the wolf has is big, his paws, his ears, his eyes, his teeth, well what else you pervert, what else? And he invariably answers with lies meant to drag Little Red in bed next to him. So we may conclude: infantile corruption, seduction and sexual perversions.
Facts: The good hunter comes, shoots the wolf and frees grandma and Little Red
Analysis: What in God’s name is a hunter doing in grandma’s house? unless he was badly intended. And what the hell is he doing hunting wolves on private property? He’s either a freaking poacher or some big government dude who pays a shit load of cash to satisfy his own sadistic needs. Whatever the truth he should have been shunned by the fairytale creator not glorified for his “great deed”.
The end to this story is sickest of all: the wolf fighting in the claws of death (and we ask ourselves why our children are seriously fucked up in every possible way) “frees” the two women. So we are presented with the horror of assisting to the apparition of two partially digested beings, who seem not to have died and off-handedly catch up their life span as if nothing had ever happened.
Such make-belief fiction is served daily by sick minds to our poor unsuspecting children between the ages of 2 and 7. Don’t even get me started on literature’s greatest horror: “Snow White”, listen to this bull shit, Snow White lives in the forest with 7 little dudes, I mean come on, hellooooooooo…
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